I'm secure enough about my paddling that I do not need to denigrate others because they prefer a different paddle or boat.
Aw, come on Charlie, there's nothing wrong with some good natured ribbing, and besides, some of those smarmy yakkers bring it on themselves. On Facebook, I noticed a group called
The Church of the Double-Bladed Paddle. I used to own a kayak when I was younger and could fit in one, and the only time religion was involved with the dirty double blade was when I was upside down in rapids praying for my life, trying to squeeze a couple of hundred pounds of bolognie out of a five pound hole.
And then there's that attitude found amongst so many entry level yakkers, that Holier than Thou thing. For instance, on the afore mentioned religious facebook page, one of the acolytes posts a picture of a canoe and says
Single blade because I was too lazy to go get the kayaks. Makes me think of the Catholics in town who had to go worship in the Presbyterian church when their basement flooded. They did it, but held their noses the entire time. I know lots of yakkers who have such a strong religious animosity to the Single Blade supplicants that they would not set foot in a canoe. Good thing too, as the basic catechisms for making a canoe go straight were never taught in Yakkers Sunday School.
Now I'm not one to anthropomorphize my paddles or boats (indeed, the latest paddle I am building will be called Spanky), and I know canoeists have gone overboard, hanging their assorted pricey animal tail paddles on their living room walls. However, when a yakker meets a canoeists on the water, it's like the age old transubstantiation vs consubstantiation argument. The Yakker thinks his kayak has transformed him into Jesus Christ, while the canoeist knows his boat is merely a metaphorical vessel that propels him toward a religious experience.
No-one is trying to start the Hundred Years war here, and I'm certainly not Martin Luther hammering the Ninety Five Theses on the Catholic Church's door. However, in my own Presbyterian fashion, sometimes the little guy has to make his voice heard.
I bet Donald Trump is a Yakker, probably paddles some horrible looking plastic coffin. My second speculation is that Bernie Sanders is a one stick kinda guy, in a wood canvas canoe. Hillary is probably a yakker too, one of those ones that thinks because she can make a kayak go straight, she is master of the solo canoe and every other self propelled vessel in the world.
Pierre Trudeau and his son Justin, both leaders of the great country known as Canada, were and are both accomplished single stick paddlers.
There, religion, politics and kayaks all in one thread, I'll probably get banned.